I was reminded today that it's been three years and three days since the doctor told me there was no evidence of cancer.  That is the term used to describe my specific illness.  We don't think of being cancer free but rather there is no evidence of disease.  Let me be honest and say it totally slipped my mind.  Part of me knew perhaps something was going on.  But it never penetrated my conscious mind.  My first thought is that is both a bad and a good thing.  The good part is just living life without keeping track of such occasions.  The bad part lies in the temptation to forget all of the lessons learned along the way. 

Seems hard to imagine that three years ago I had no hair but also no evidence of disease.  There are a few photos that serve as a reminder but thankfully there isn't many.  Just over three years ago the doctor told me my disease was of the stage four quality.  No amount of bedside manner eases the shock of that pronouncement.  We started right away with an extremely powerful mixture of chemicals that would poison my body.  Six times I went into the clinic to sit waiting for them to flow through my system.  It is an odd thing that such an occasion can almost seem ordinary after awhile.  I never missed a Sunday.  My schedule remained much the same except for a little more time to rest.  Even my trips to the gym never wavered.  I would go take chemo for about six hours then go home, change, and head to the gym to exercise.  I sometimes wonder what I was thinking.

My prayer then was to get well whether my miracle, medicine, or a mixture of the two.  The turning point was after my doctor told me this is an incurable but treatable ailment.  You may remember that my response to her was she should be the first person to come up with a cure.  We saw eye to eye after that exchange.  Polio was once considered beyond a cure but now we are years past that diagnosis.  I continue to hope science will make even more discoveries to treat this disease in any form.

One of the drawbacks for me is that cancer is part of my view on life.  There are many things that just not nearly crucial for me any longer.  I also know what it is to deepen a spiritual walk in the midst of trials.  That does not mean I am anywhere near perfect.  It does mean that you can be sure God is not limited by what happens to us.  You can be sure than anxiety still creeps in from time to time.  And yet God allowed me to face a horrible diagnosis and come out on the winning side.  Being thankful is extremely easy after something like that.

Bro. Trey