This is the second day after the big reveal of yesterday. Wish there was better news to report but it appears the illness remains. Adjustment to any life change takes more than 24 hours. To fully comprehend a significant change will take more than 48 hours. Perhaps there are people who can just roll with the flow in life but that isn't my story. However, the original kick in the gut is giving away to mere butterflies. The facts are not going to be any different without divine intervention so the best thing to do is to deal with reality.

That is where for many people it becomes confusing. Any enormous setback in the plans of life will affect more than just a single situation. We have to deal with the personal elements of a crisis. Most of that concerns just realizing how human we are. We really are not invulnerable to real life. Then you have to take into account the impact of the setback into the lives of those you care about. How can you balance self care with also caring for those who really matter? A big issue is all of the "what ifs" that crash into your cranium. This is just more frustrating as it adds to the list of things beyond your control. The temptation is to tackle each question until solved even though it may not be possible. Instead of focusing on what you can control, you end up chasing your tail trying to keep everything together. You forget the reason for the "what ifs" is that everything just came apart.

Unfortunately, my mind is one of those prone to the "what ifs." This is where the roller coaster begins with no promise of coming to an end. Honestly, this is one of the weakest areas of my character. Fear can begin to overcome the faith you aim to keep. For example, my disease seems to be very treatable. There will be the physical symptoms while going through treatment but the information suggests that there is reason for optimism. I don't mean a false optimism but there can be real promise of health before long. The key is to keep myself off the roller coaster.

How does faith fit into all of this? One thing that is true is God can do anything He chooses. I will indeed look for and ask Him for healing. Should that answer not come then my desire is to learn to let His resources fill in any gaps. That is part of the idea of asking God for daily bread. We depend on Him for the stuff we need to get through the day. Sometimes that help comes from His word. There are times it comes from others. My youngest and I took off and went to town today. That time with him was terrific in quieting the butterflies. Prayer does take on a whole new zeal during these days. It helps me try to keep my mind off me and onto the bigger issues. We tend to want God's best stuff without really wanting Him. So we keep at the praying until we discover just how great He really is. That is when His strength is more than able to work through our weakness. Let's hope we all discover that no matter the crisis.

Bro. Trey