This is proving to be the weekend of disbelief. My mind is still trying to wrap itself around the test results from Thursday. Chemo needed only three rounds to knock out the signs of cancer. Believe me, there are many people who go through far worse than three rounds without seeing these type of results. It is beyond my imagination why mine was much responsive to the therapy. Gloating still is not an option for me. My heart goes out to so many who face this same illness. Humility seems to me to be a given. My primary feeling is that of being humble because this response is due to God's grace. We said we would accept a healthy outcome by miracle or medicine. Perhaps this happened with a combination of the two.

Odds are that this may not be my last time to deal with lymphoma. It may be a short or a long time until it wants to appear again. Some patients go for years without having a relapse. There are others who face this disease on what seems to be a regular basis. No one can tell you if or how long it will be until a next time. No one can even tell you if there will be a next time. This is part of the nature of this illness. My hope is for that it stays away for a very long time. There are still three more round of chemo coming up for me. Round four starts on Monday. I can't say that this is a pleasant thought. But the goal is to drive any remaining amount of the lymphoma far away. It will be interesting to see how the regimen of medication affects me now as opposed to when the cancer was active. Maybe my recovery time will be smoother and stronger.

One can only hope that life will be far different now than it was before the diagnosis. Today I went back to review some of my thoughts as the process got underway. Guess my hope was the initial desperation will give way to continual dependence. Much did change over the last few weeks or months. Most of the change seems to be for the good. No doubt there are vast areas where room remains for improvement. My prayer is that there will be a constant openness to whatever God may wish to do. I cannot imagine where life would be were it not for this process of dealing with lymphoma. I just hope it remains that the last word each day comes from God and not the disease.

Bro. Trey