Tomorrow is yet another visit to the doctor. This is getting ridiculous. Most of my waking hours are getting spent on going or coming from there. My schedule says this is ninth trip to some doctor or the other just this month. Last week felt very odd in that there was only one time that I needed to be at the clinic. Perhaps some of this will slow down as we go further in the process. There is no doubt but this is an adjustment time for me. What shape that takes is still up in the air.

I spent some time this weekend feeling my way through all of this. There was some time left free to read and reflect. My goal is to be sure that any adjustment moves in a positive direction. I do not want to over analyze things but that is a facet of my personality. I am diagnosed with a disease called cancer. It is not the only thing that ails me. My blood pressure tends to run high as well. That does not even mention the poor vision of my eyes. Most days the last two issues never cross my mind. At least neither of them make me take a deep breath from anxiety. They are just part of who I am in this journey of life. There are medicines to take as well as other things to keep me generally whole. It seems that perhaps this is where my illness is going now.

If there is a blessing to my condition it is that there are breakthroughs taking place on a regular basis now. Scientists are creating and testing new approaches to therapy that show the promise of real success. Again, I want to be cured, healed or otherwise fixed whether by miracle of God or medicine. Never doubt my heart's desire for my prayer. But there is the very real possibility should that miracle not arrive that medicine is going to make this just another part of my life. Yes, it is hard to compare cancer to being near sighted but maybe you get the idea. This is all part of my ongoing adjustment to this new reality.

Let me honestly express gratitude to God for His goodness this last week. There were basically zero side effects from the treatment. The lab visit tomorrow will show more of what is taking place but there wasn't really much of a hint of a horrible time. Anyway, I know to be humble with all that is going on. If there is a point to this night's rambling it would be that we learn to adjust to new normals in life. Sometimes that happens due to the bad stuff that occurs. Let's hope much of it happens due to the goodness of God. May He become your new normal regardless of what else happens in your world.

Bro. Trey