Thank goodness that 2014 is coming to an end. It's been the longest year ever around here. There will be no list of crises we faced during the past twelve months. Room doesn't remain here for that exercise. Let's just leave it at few people are happier to start a new year than yours truly. Now we turn the calendar to a new year. Just remember that you also change not just the year but each day. We may have 2015 waiting on us but we go through it one day at a time. I saw where someone wrote we have a blank book with 365 pages waiting to be written. You can make decisions each day to fill it with stuff or with the awesome. Far too many settle for stuff without making room for the awesome.
No one can predict what the year holds in any area of life. You may read or watch lots of the experts suggest their ideas but no one on the planet knows the outcome. I may hope to avoid any new ailments or any serious crisis but there are no promises. Do we really want to focus on what may or may not happen or just move confidently in God's basic purposes? One path leads to anxiety while the other does bring into existence a path to God's best. My desire is to keep an eye each day on the basics to keep a firm foundation for the future.
There was one odd thought that crossed my mind while locked away in a hospital room for three weeks. You may not understand but it's one that only a person who deals with life and death far too often. I go through weeks of poison and pain for what reason. Some do this with the idea that succeeding will promise life with comfort and ease. I had the realization at some point that even being healthy now will not protect me from death at some point. That may sound cold or even cruel but it is very true. My greatest hope is to be healthy for as long as possible. I would love to live a very long time but death is not to be escaped.
I know these are two very different and weird ideas but bear with me. We do not know at all what 2015 will bring. Putting every date on our calendar is an act of faith. Do we or will we trust Him each day no matter the conditions? That is the hard question. You can respond to the good and the bad in this year either in full or blind faith in God or you can be swept away but events. The good news is faith need not be blind. You live in the light of His word every single day regardless of what takes place. Here is the key to this. Your life will be richer and fuller by His activity. You will look past life and death issues to gaze in His wonderful face. So the things of earth will grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace.
Bro. Trey
Has anyone noticed the overflow of Christmas movies on television lately? One channel seems determined to brainwash us with such films on a 24 hour basis. Most of them are fluffy romance films with the holiday season being only the setting. Telling a story during the Christmas season must change things for the writers of these efforts. You do find some of the themes of this season should you watch. Every film touches on peace, love, or joy as it tells its tale. The couple usually do fall in love to end up living happily ever after. Whatever miracle is required comes through at the last minute to bring everyone joy or something similar. Even the worst of families or relationships are healed by peace. I really do not mind these programs but they always leave something out. Why do we even have a Christmas to begin with?
Some tell us that dark forces are taking Jesus out of Christmas to our danger. Maybe that is true but what if it is something not so ominous? If believers neglect what really goes on with the holiday then why should we expect anyone else to make it real? Let me confess my real disdain for the cliché that Jesus is the reason for the season. I do not disagree with that sentiment but we once again try to take the cosmic and turn it into a slogan we can easily remember. No one can really capture the truth that the God of this universe came into our world as a newborn child with all that means. No slogan can wrap its mind around the idea that the creator God would become a Savior by the most unlikely means. This was not some spur of the moment decision by Him but it is the outcome of centuries of divine activity in the world.
Whatever in the world God was doing in the Old Testament would lead directly to the manger in Bethlehem. All of those odd or confusing stories of sacrifice, calling, and human failure would spell out how much we need God's help. Even an odd book like Leviticus is meant to remind us how we need more than animal offerings to bring God to us. There is almost two millennia of history leading up to the babe in swaddling clothes. Yet some of us seem far more comfortable doing what we can do to help God rather than just accept His help now. We do the religious thing so God may feel an obligation to come along to help us when we cannot help ourselves. Yet that still falls short of the story.
God came into this world through Jesus to reveal who He is in word and deed. He will take the first step in reaching out to those in critical need on every level of life. Jesus will be more than just a nice teacher or philosopher. We see a muscular God who dares to give of Himself with no guarantee of any response. His words would turn that world upside down when we learn a new image of God. Not everyone would get what He was saying since they were focused on how life should be going. Even less would grasp what He did as their expectations left no room in their heart or minds for truth. Peace, love, and joy are more than the outcomes of happy experiences. They truly cannot be known without Jesus. Anything else is a mere shadow of what Christmas is about.
I want every Christmas season to be about Jesus. That may be difficult if all we look for is a holiday in soft focus or candlelight. We find in a manger that the holiday can be treacherous and even dangerous when we allow it to settle in on us. But we cannot find Christmas any other way. He did indeed come to our world so we could capture His fullness not by doing our best but allow God to do His. That is why it is a gift. That is why it is about Jesus.
Bro. Trey
This blogger stuff seemed like a fun thing to do when it started. Maybe part of me was convinced that I would somehow change the world with my little site. Now it just seems like it gets harder and harder to do. Words that sound good in my mind then come out flat on the screen. No matter how much time it appears is available that same time runs out for one reason or the other. Perhaps it just resides within my inability to manage time or think through the thoughts that strike me on occasion. Who knows all of the reasons for a lack of consistency when writing?
You would think that three weeks locked away in a room would be enough to give you all sorts of new direction for living. I went into my exile away from all that is normal for me with the idea of learning radical new truth. So far that is light years from reality. This does not mean there was no deep moments of thought or prayer. It also does not mean there was not enough time for reading scripture. Time was more than abundant but maybe there is something more at work. Being overcome by chemotherapy is no easy road to take. The amount of poison that was poured into me seems almost illegal. What those chemicals do to you is beyond words. Days were spent not going day by day but basically hour by hour. You are not in charge of your schedule, your feelings, or your faculties. What is true is that you simply hope to hang on until something better comes along. It is very possible to mistake being helpless for being hopeless. There are no emotions to be felt as they melt away with the rest of your being.
This is a surprising discovery along the way. My expectation was to feel greatly or deeply with God as we journeyed together. Most days were devoid of feeling other than how do I get through this day. Now there is some excitement as lab reports tell me of the ongoing recovery. Everything is working just as the doctor predicted yet I cannot tell you there is a swell of emotion that comes along with it. I still wake up each day ready to deal with whatever that date holds for me. I still make time to turn to God praying for myself and for others that need His help. I still turn to scripture to hear what God may be wanting to say to me on that day. Yet it is all within the context of a new normal. It all resides within God doing what He can to bring about change in my being.
Maybe we get change all wrong from the outset. We anticipate some radical dimension of God's presence to sweep us off our feet to magically set us in a new reality. Sometimes change may be less sweeping and dramatic than it is slow and sure. What we may long for is change without the pain of wrestling with God, self and life. Maybe we expect to be like Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz and just wake up in a new dimension. We may discover that transition is more nightmare than it appears. God doesn't work in our life. No house worth living in goes up without time to make sure it is safe. Our life is worth far more than that to Him. So don't always look for the easy or emotional signs of change. Learn to hold onto Him when it is really hard. That is when God is doing His very best work in you.
Bro. Trey
This hospital stuff gets old real fast. Patience is not my virtue when it comes to doing lots of sitting. But one can learn how to sit and wait when ill like this. At least we are moving forward toward a resolution rather than being at the start of a journey. That was not the case back in August. I ended up staying in the hospital then for 8 days for diagnosis and my first treatment. There was nothing good or fun about that time. Sometimes it amazes me that some well meaning doctor didn't kill me while trying to cure me. I am not sure the doctors didn't try!
I went into the hospital the afternoon of August 17 with varied pains and symptoms that made no sense. You may recall me saying at times that summer was hard on me. The physicians started working me over upon my arrival. I cannot recall how many different doctors or diagnoses that came my way prior to the final answer. What is true is no two doctors talked to one another or compared notes. My biggest trial was not in fighting my current ailment but surviving their pokes and prods.
There was even a small fight with one of the doctors as we moved into the chemo phase of the stay. I finally looked at her and asked if she would mind very much if this didn't turn out to be fatal. Yes, she was a bit shocked upon that question. It got to the point where stubbornness set in. I made the decision to take charge of my treatment without just letting anyone do as they wished. Some medicine was refused when offered. There were also times of demanding that my usual doctors be consulted rather than have anyone who wandered by to do something that crossed their mind. Nobody tells you that you have the final word on what does or does not happen with their body. But this is a truth that remains first and foremost in my mind.
God knows how He wired us at creation. We would do well to listen to our system as to what is going on with it. I know that much of my time praying relates to just being grateful for having the knowledge to hear my condition loud and clear. Too many people will just turn over their care to people they do now know at times when it is not needed. Faith may sometimes mean being stubborn enough to defy the answers around you. God knows what is going on in your body at any given time. He can let you know what you may have to do in not just the physical but in every arena of life. We have to be aware of His voice for any occasion. What touches us in the physical will affect us in all of our being. The spiritual can change how things run in your physical. All of life is connected rather than being separate. Let us learn from even the worst of times how that can be more blessing than burden.
Bro. Trey
