Yes, we keep trying to blog but who knew we would experience a rainy season?  I spent more time mowing last week than usual by summer standards.  This is really not complaining but just a fact.  My yard could produce a few bales of hay after each cutting.  Just another unexpected turn of events these days.

I did make time to go to the oncologist today.  My schedule is to go every six months or so for checkups.  Fours years ago is when my treatment for cancer got underway.  So far the results are positive with no sign of a recurring problem.  We all deal with our problems differently.  No two people are going to walk through those times in the same fashion.  Some appear to just carry on as if nothing was wrong.  Others may really struggle with the process of therapy.  A few will fall in the middle range between those two options.  I am learning that remission doesn't mean that disease has no effect on me.  Not all of that discovery is positive or worth bragging about.  But it is far better to be honest than to live in denial.

People tend to overlook how life can throw us off track.  Those lucky few who can manage to keep their focus just make it harder for us who struggle.  My lessons revolve around two or three major headings.  One of those truths relates back to who I am and how that affects my coping even four years out from diagnosis.  Perhaps it does not have to be that way but it is true.  Another issue is in how I allow others to assist me in the journey both then and now.  We who are introverts can sadly miss out on that source of encouragement.  There is of course that whole other area of how this influences my relationship with God.  Be sure that a person can keep Him at arms distance at the least just as they might with other people.  This doesn't mean we don't truly have faith or really believe but it is about keeping control over self.  That is about as specific as we will get for tonight.

What you may find is theology may suffer from how we process our world.  Our coping may lack something you just cannot put your finger on.  Being a genuine believer goes far beyond quoting scripture or doing nice things.  God always wants to work in our heart so He can work through our life.  Our struggle is in not wasting those dark times when He seems to do His most holy work.  The good news is that as long as we have breath then we also have the possibility for real growth.  God is not limited to our situation or how we calculate our conditions.  He is free to move beyond our limits or our fears.  Our part is to allow Him to do just that.  We may be forced into being vulnerable, humble or desperate to let Him do just that.  Such an approach may frighten us more than the problem itself.  So may we allow God to do His great work so we are finally free from this world's clutches.  Probably it will not make sense to some but know it always is worth the struggle.

Bro. Trey

We get back to the blog this evening after another short hiatus.  Adjusting to the summer schedule is taking longer than I thought.  Look for more updates this week as time allows.

Today was yet again Father's Day.  Many people may not see it as a complicated day but it can happen in our current state.  Not everyone has a pleasant experience on this holiday but mine did go well.  I finished the day watching a documentary on the 41st President George H. W. Bush.  Critics were not kind to the man for years but there is more respect coming his way with each passing day.  He left office with an approval rating around 30%.  That rating is now up around the 70% mark.  Not everyone would yet be in agreement with all of his decisions but less question how he lives his life.  This is a man who even became friends with the person who defeated him for the White House in 1992.  You can count on one hand anyone with that much dignity.

The historian side of me is amazed at the character of George Bush.  Here is a guy who is a war hero, congressman, ambassador, Vice President and then President.  It may be some time before we elect another leader with all of the qualities.  But it is also that personal nature of the man that captures the real attention.  He is a man with grace under fire.  He knows the pain of setbacks yet continues to reach forward with optimism.  He is an imperfect person but recognizes that with humility.  He may not be a saint but he also may come as close as one gets in this ugly day and age. 

He jumped out of an airplane this past week to mark his 90th birthday.  Maybe go back and read that sentence once again.  Jumping in tandem with a trained skydiver seems an odd way to celebrate another year of life.  My point is we can go on about such stuff for a long time but it is the family that speaks volumes here.  Age brings a certain grace as you move along.  A legacy becomes balanced between the good and the bad things in life.  You learn what really counts in this world.  Could it be possible that this is one of the reasons for a Father's Day?  We can stop to weigh our achievements with our opportunity to be a father.  Do we matter at the one place it counts most?

I would love to tell you that my experience of being a dad is without flaw or error.  That would be a tad over evaluating my life.   But my hope is that I did try.  Being a father is not something to take lightly.  Some accused me of being too much there with or for my children.  Such words never bother me.  It's not something too many guys have to deal with being a dad.  None of us ever do it perfectly.  But too few of us try as much as possible.  My greatest joy is life is being a father even though mine are now older.  Jumping out of a plane doesn't scare me as much as not being my best for my children.  I absolutely need God's help for that to happen.  I know how God has to work in me so He can work through me.  That happening means that even if fame doesn't come my way I at least know to be faithful. That will always be good enough for me.

Bro. Trey

Few weeks ever seemed as long as Graduation 2014.  Well in sight is the finish line.  Just one more long day with sun and heat is all that's left to wrap this up.  Soon all of the preparation will be done and maybe there will be a moment or two to catch my breath.  Our next graduation is this December but that will be in Waco.  I have zero intention of going through all of this in a distant city.  No doubt but all of this is worth it.  Who could ever imagine my youngest would be a graduate?

My youngest is autistic.  Now that means a whole bunch of things that seldom duplicate from one person to another.  Some of the memories of his diagnosis feel like it was yesterday.  Other recollections become a bit more hazy with time.  He went through more than a few tests in those early days.  Most of them came with soul crushing news.  One expert said he would never do much in school as he grew.  My son surpassed those expectations in his own way.  We started around fourteen years ago on this educational journey.  Tomorrow will be an end for this part of it.

No one should ever anticipate such a path will not be without trials or setbacks.  Let me admit there was more than once or twice when we had to become more aggressive about what he was experiencing.  Not all teachers are really good at special needs children even with a degree in the subject.  Summer is one of those obstacles as He tended to lose what he knew when out of school.  A few problems are going to remain private just because they left their unique sore spots.  But he made it in the end.  He reads. He writes. He does math.  He is not just getting a diploma because he is eighteen but he earned it on his level. 

He is my hero in many ways.  I sometimes envy that certain innocence of his due to his autism.  Oblivious is a good word to describe his awareness of the global troubles of the day.  He does not worry about the economy, healthcare or any other crisis that looms large for many of us.  His world is simple.  Having a special needs child can teach you on what matters and what really doesn't.  None of it is really easy but it is worthwhile.

I do wonder why God allows such to happen to some.  Many children face life with horrific limitations physically, mentally and emotionally.  Maybe they are here to show us the best part of who we can be.  We consider our world to be normal but we get stressed out by small stuff.  I have no clue what or how he thinks about a lot.  The same is true for the other students in his class.  What is true is these children do exist and are worth our best.  God created them just as much as He does those that are normal.  So we live with them and love them.  We hang in there with them as they grow.  We laugh at the silly things they do.  We cry when alone so no one notices.  We become better people because of them.  That is God's gift to us.  We simply take those blessings to give to others.  Now that is what normal people can and should do.

Bro. Trey

We are now just under 48 hours until graduation on Friday evening.  I'm still behind as usual but at least there is time to catch up.  Soon this will be over but my guess is I will miss it then.  Summer tends to go that way.

So what do we do about praying?  It seems so common to our life but many still seem uncomfortable with it.  Prayer may be the most mysterious topic in our spiritual life.  Bible study can be done with the right mechanics.  Other habits of the spiritual life can be taught or measured.  Praying just seems to be an art form we talk much about but maybe feel like we don't do it so well.  Then there are my charismatic friends who relate to me about their special prayer language.  More than a few in the past hinted that real praying does not take place without that.  Was the act of praying meant to be so technical or complicated?  I think not.

My best advice is to approach prayer as you do any relationship.  Communication is huge in any growing friendship or marriage.  Tons of books exist on how we can open up more to friends, spouses, or children.  Experience tells me that there is usually some kernel of helpful reality within all of those pages.  It also says to me that you just have to talk to one another with or without outside help.  Those of us who are shy or introverted by nature are going to struggle no matter what the latest book suggests.  Those who are open or gregarious by nature will still tend to say too much.  But never forget that praying is a two way street.  We do talk to God but we can expect Him to also talk to us.  Going past our wants or needs with our praying will make a huge difference in how we feel about it.

Jesus will respond to the disciples request for help in their praying in an odd fashion.  He doesn't start with an outline for a notebook.  What you see is His emphasis on God as our father.  The entire statement on "The Lord's Prayer" is not terribly long but its application can last forever.  We discover that God knows our needs far beyond our wants.  Jesus makes it a point to remind us that God is the one who provides for us.  Those truly intrigued disciples will find out that praying starts with God long before it gets to us.  They learn that knowing Him is the heart of praying.  Prayer languages or carefully detailed outlines matter far less than our heart when we come to Him.

Don't think of your praying as something that needs approval.  Worry less about getting the words right than you do just absorbing God into your being.  Jesus spent countless hours praying as He moved through life.  A broken heart is as much a mark of true prayer as is being overjoyed in His presence.  Spend much time simply reflecting on the words in that prayer of Jesus.  You will begin to know God as He really is.  Then the issue will not be how you pray as much as how can you not pray.  God sends Jesus to reclaim us as His own.  Just remember that you are one of those who do know God as father.  He is big enough to handle anything in your life and interested in those small details.  Avoid playing mind games over what you should or should not say, do or be when praying.  You are who you are.  God can correct any mistakes without the self abuse of guilt over any failure.  That will go a long way in making prayer less of a chore and more of a joy.

Bro. Trey

There is time this evening to put up a blog post.  Mowing was the main thing on my list of things to do today and it's done.  Graduation still looms in the distance on Friday night but so far it's going good. 

We talked a little last night about our community service.  One of the issues was what happens when charismatics act...like charismatics.  It just seems fair to spend a bit more time on that topic.  Just be very clear at the outset that I harbor no ill will towards those who practice various elements of that persuasion.  Time is too important to rail against how others do or do not put faith into life.  But it may be only fair to add a few thoughts of my perspective on all of this.  Obviously this could take more than a short post to cover.  Perhaps you can capture some idea of where I personally come from.

You can imagine that it would be hard on me to be in that line of theology with my personality.  Most of my response to spiritual moments is inward as is my normal character.  You probably will not ever find me noisy and vocal during any move of the Spirit.  I do not and will not judge another for how they express their faith.  I simply do not equate being loud for being spiritual.  I witnessed before how some groups really turn up the pressure on some to behave in one way or the other in their faith.  God works through all believers while usually being in line with that personality.  Now this does not mean silence is golden when it comes to vocalizing your faith.  Scripture speaks of all manner of emotion or expression when in worship or prayer.  I just think we can guard against any elitism or pride about how we do what we do in comparison to another person.

My theology says we are filled with the Spirit upon our conversion or salvation moment with God in Christ.  It also believes that the initial experience of speaking in tongues had far more to do with evangelism than personal devotion.  Acts 2 is a miracle of God using ordinary people to proclaim and extraordinary message.  People gathered in the streets would hear the gospel in their language as the Spirit moved.  Believers should remember that anything God does in or through us is for that purpose.  God works to save those who do not know Him first and foremost.  Even if you do possess a special prayer language you should recall the test of maturity is character along with reaching out to others.  Does this mean my charismatic friends are wrong?  To me it is much more about all of us who follow Jesus being aware of any gift given to extend the Kingdom. 

We do not need to make any of this a point of contention.  There are far more popular ministers than I that criticize anyone who contains even of whiff of charismatic ideas.  Do not look for me to join that chorus.  Part of being in the Kingdom means there is no single way to back God into a corner.  Just be sure to look more toward Him than focus on gifts or approaches to worship.  We know from scripture that the Spirit is here to make Jesus known through our life.  How are we doing at that regardless of the label we wear?

Bro. Trey

Life moves pretty fast these days.  Having a graduation coming up this Friday only adds to the insanity.  We will try to get a few posts up this week if at all possible.  Just know my heart is willing even if the clock isn't.

So tonight was yet another community service in my small town.  Perhaps you recall my mentioning these events over the last year.  We get together on a regular basis for worship and fellowship with all of our churches.  You may also need to know that the church word for fellowship really means to eat.  Being with our other ministers and churches is a huge blessing for me.  More than a few towns have no idea what it is that we are doing.  Those are places where churches never really get to know one another as we have here.  God truly had a miracle in mind as we launched out in this effort.  I will forever be grateful for these times.

We went a whole new direction this evening in our service.  Our host church is more in line with Pentecostal practices than any of us.  The lead pastor wanted us to have a time to pray for people to be healed.  That does not really bother me in the least.  I also live with the conviction that our God does heal even if not always by our expectations.  Who knew that a majority of those in attendance would come forward asking for prayer?  My guess is we spent about 40 minutes in all praying with and for people with various ailments and needs.  I even used some oil to lead in prayers.  Members of our host church tonight were so excited some spoke in tongues according to their tradition and theology.  There were even closet charismatics giving way to their private approaches to praying.  This again did not bother me in the least.  It may not be my habit but it didn't hurt me one bit.

I considered that approach years ago while still in college.  Visits were made to churches like this one along with reading and studying on that theology.  My resistance to the whole tongues issue is not a rejection of those who practice it.  Just because some broke out in their prayer language is no reason for me to sit in judgment.  I was able to pray or worship even without that aspect of church life.  My hope is we can all agree that some may indeed develop that sense of speaking in tongues while those of us who do not are no less a believer.  Too often we allow the peripheral issues of the church to divide us rather than be part of our growth.  We can embrace those with different ideas as long as we unite around that biblical theology of Jesus.  We may not always do that but we could.

My hope is always for us to agree on the basics or fundamentals as they were once called.  Surely we can be mature enough not to allow other aspects of theology to divide us.  We need each other in today's world.  Scripture says God is less interested in how we do our praying than how we do it with pure motives.  I do truly believe God was pleased tonight by our gathering together.  My hope is He responds to the cry of those hearts this evening with a great blessing where God gets all of the credit. 

Bro. Trey