Tonight will definitely be short and to the point. It's late on Friday night and I am weary. The school called me today to run the clock in the old gym for three basketball games. Clock running may be a talent that you did not know I possessed. Two of the games were for freshman teams. One game was for J.V. girls. Out of three games only one was remotely good. The others were just an endurance test. Those are four hours of my life that will not be given back. Now it was fun to be out and see people away from the usual places. That is the only saving grace of the evening. Sorry if this sounds grumpy. We will do better tomorrow.

Let me leave you with a question. Perhaps it is better to describe it as a thought rather than a question. It occurred to me today while reflecting on the idea of love in the scriptures. In Deuteronomy we are told that to love God totally is the highest mark of spiritual maturity. Jesus echoes that idea in the gospels. The first letter of the apostle John repeatedly mentions the love of God as a gift we receive as well as give away. Yet God does not make us or force us to love Him. It is a choice you and I must make on our own. He will not override our will to enforce His desires. So the question is, how are you doing with love? Will you choose to love Him seeing as He displays His love for you?

Bro. Trey

Most of my time is taken up with solving the theological conundrums of the cosmos. Some of my time is interacting with the neuroses of people who struggle with life's realities. Another part of my time is in trying to find ways to guide people into better living. One way of describing that part of the work is that it is like herding cats. Then there is my so called normal life of fatherhood. When all of that is out of the way then I enjoy reading mystery novels. Nothing is better for an escape than a thrilling whodunit type of writing. There is quite a collection of works on my shelves. Most of these books are by favorite authors with familiar characters. It is relaxing to get into the mind of the lead actor in these books to match wits with them. Sometimes I can even find the answer to the mystery before the writer spells it out. Sometimes it takes me to the end of the book to solve the mystery. It is still a great way to unwind without leaving the house.

All of that is to say that when we think about love we can find it quite the mystery. My recent review of the biblical material of love does nothing to ease that tension. Do you realize that God loves us even when He knows we will fall short? Did it ever occur to you that His words on forgiving others is healthy and not just hard? Can you even begin to imagine just how much real love went into the experience of the cross? It really is a mystery as to how God in all His bigness chose to love humanity. You and I receive this incredible love in our lives even while we still consistently fail.

We may never be able to wrap our mind around this concept of God's love. The good news is we don't have to succeed at it. We are never asked to prepare for some exam on love. Wait. Perhaps we are asked to prepare for an exam. That test will not be on paper with philosophical questions. That test will come in our lives now and later. The question is not did we grasp it with our mind. The issue is did we take it to our heart. Just remember this exam is simply pass or fail. I hope you get the answer right now.

Bro. Trey

Because I have no life, I was watching C Span last night. That is the network that covers the various government agencies including Congress. Last night the Senate Finance Committee was discussing the so called "stimulus bill." I have big concerns about its passage but that's not the point. It looked to me as if even the Senators were lost in the details of this nearly 700 page document. Members of both parties were expressing strong reservation about the details in the bill. My thought was if these intelligent people were struggling to understand it, what hope does the average citizen have?

The transition of that moment is in the idea that perhaps we do not understand love as much as we claim. If we are truly loving followers of Jesus then why do we have so many damaged disciples? If we are truly loving others then why is it difficult to get members to sign off on the project of 40 Days of Love? Loving disciples are marked by a loving character. Sadly the history of the church in general is not the story of love. Far too often we allowed racism to dictate our doctrine. We spend more time that we realize in finding differences between people of other denominations. And far too often we would rather stay in committee meetings than actually touch the lives of those that are lost. Yes, these are wide generalizations yet they are too often real.

It is not easy for me to sit and cast stones about whether or not we are loving. God knows how much room there is for me to develop more of a loving nature. Only He knows all of the damage inflicted in my soul over the years that hinders my love. Yet, will we be honest enough to take a long look into our soul to discern whether or not we truly understand love?

Real love is tough. There are lots of things in relationships that are easy. Real love is the toughest part of growing as a person. It's tough because it has to cut away the scars from the past. We can easily allow the very real pain of the past to limit how much we risk to love. It's tough because on occasion love has to take a stand. It has to draw that line in the sand in setting the limits of painful people to injure us. Real love is tough because it has to tackle the differences between people that can remain obstacles to love rather than bridges to relationships. Jesus understood that real love is tough. Just take a long look at the nail prints in His hands and feet to discover that.

Real love is also tender. It is the heart that is broken over the plight of people in need. It is the tender tug of our emotions when we open up to God or another person. It is emotional as we express love to those who are grieving, hurting, or failing in life. Real love is found in the emotions of Jesus when He encounters the family of Lazarus who died. It is also found in His tears when Jesus does what only He can do in raising that same Lazarus from the dead. We sometimes do our religious thing without being in touch with those emotions that are born of God. I would need to confess to that failure more than once in my life.

So is the mystery of love. It is tough and it is tender. It isn't either/or but is both/and. It feels all the passion we seek in life. It also offers the comfort we need in our darkest hours. Life is complicated and often difficult. God in His love offers us hope in bridging the gaps. He does that so we can build bridges with others.

Bro. Trey

A Big PS to Today

First, be safe in the weather. Right now it looks like we get by without much damage. Just watch out for the other guy when driving. Second, go as fast as you can over to aintsobad.typepad.com to read the ideas that Rick Davis is putting up. He echoes things that I've known for a few years now. Perhaps after we deal with love a bit more then we will follow up on his writing. Just know his words are not for the faint of heart.

Bro. Trey

Some four letter words scare us. Some of them can offend us. Ours is a day when the four letter word with all the adjectives, adverbs and prepositions attached are far too common. You can't hardly go to any movie without hearing them. You can't watch television without being surprised at what they can say now. Music is far too often a litany of four letter language that bombards our brains. Many years ago George Carlin did his hysterical yet very profane monologue on the words you can't say on television. He lived to see most of those words used on a constant basis. Four letter words are usually not a good thing. But sometimes they are a necessity.

We use four letter words in church. Pray is four letters long. Give is four letters long. Love is a four letter word. Are we scared of using those? Maybe if we knew more about what those words really mean we would not be quite so hesitant. Deuteronomy is the Old Testament textbook on love. Chances are that biblical book is not on your "must read" list. Change that as soon as possible and read it. Focus in on chapters 4-13 to zero in on what God says about His love and ours. Finish up in chapter 30 where He closes with a summary of what love is all about. You may find yourself gaining a fresh perspective on love.

You will read of God saying that He loved His people before they were even aware of it. You will discover how He ties all of His activity to His love. You will find that God desires more than anything else that we love Him the most. Think about it in this way. Of all the activities that are central to our spiritual health the number one concern is our heart for God. Too often we are like the church in Ephesus that John describes in the Revelation. We are busy, biblical, bold yet we can be barren without love. Even Paul mentions the absolute ingredient in our spiritual walk to be that of love. He goes so far as to say that without love even the greatest of spiritual gifts is for nothing.

Four letter words like love are risky. You have to choose to love. The more that I read about love in the scriptures the more it sounds like love is not naturally in our nature. Love is a gift that we receive from God first and foremost. We will never be able to give to others what we do not receive from Him. We cannot receive from God if we are too proud to admit we need it. And so we begin that journey from pride to humility where love is a constant. God already took the first step. Now we each have to do the same. Will we?

Bro. Trey

It's not my intent to blog late at night. Sometimes it just happens to work out that way. It is not my desire to wait until late each day to write. We will try to improve on this as time goes along. Now let's turn to the topic of the evening. We sure do need to think on the topic of love in a new way. The more that I read about love as well as think about it the more it seems we are just missing the mark. What we need to recover is the authentic meaning behind that four letter word. We know how to say it but far too little on how to show it.

If you attend many of the services that I lead then you will hear me say repeatedly that love is impossible without God. Granted that is an easy statement to paraphrase from the apostle John but it's true. How on earth can we experience or express love if we do not know what it means eternally? Real love is not just being sloppily emotional. Real love is not just being greatly sensitive. Real love takes genuine action. Jesus did not merely walk around saying "I love you" but He did loving things for people. Real love is as tough as it is tender. It takes risks rather than failing to try.

There probably is not a person alive who has not felt the crushing pain of love gone amiss. Most if not all people understand what a broken heart feels like. Sometimes it happens within the family dynamic. Sometimes the broken heart takes place with friends we trusted. The saddest place it happens is in church. No one can never explain to me how followers of Jesus can injure one another so often. I do not refer to the accidental or indirect times of church life when feelings can get ruffled. People can intentionally hurt others way too much. It is far too easy for us to stop taking the eternal view of people when caught up in the emotion of the moment.

Paul said that at some point we have to leave childish things behind. He said a mouthful on that one. Some of what we need to leave behind is the childish idea that we are the center of the universe. The me first mentality within churches will eventually also be the ruin of them. Some have that mentality in wishing for or even demanding attention from other people. Some use that mentality to tear down those who do not agree with them. Sadly, there are far too many churches and people who live with the scars of such unhealthiness. Maybe over the next few days we can explore this more.

My hope is for you to learn the reality of God's love. I also hope you can learn from my mistakes as well as my scars. Maybe we can all grow up in this elusive issue of love together.

Bro. Trey

Yes, we missed our blog posting for yesterday. Life just got in the way of my best intentions. But at least we have some longer posts last week to make up for the one that I missed. My youngest and I did our usual Saturday routine. It was just us two guys around the house this weekend. He got his new games while I just drove him around. I did make the time to do more reading on the topic of love in the New Testament. There was also laundry crying out for my attention. The night just got away from me until it was too late to blog.

We don't even need to go into today's events. But as you can imagine, we will do just that. The day began about 2 am this morning when my beloved son decided it was time to wake up. He does that from time to time. One of his unique qualities is he occasionally pulls an all nighter. The only problem is that he drags me into those nights. I dozed some after that but never really rested. That was only an ominous foreshadowing of what would come later.

He and I got to church at a relatively decent hour today. The only problem was he disappeared on me after Sunday School! I still do not know where he went but he did turn up eventually. He did of course make his appearance just before the service ended. There is nothing that can help me end a service faster than him entering the sanctuary and prancing around. Now he is finally sleeping. It is quiet here. Needless to say, I am enjoying the quiet.

Today is just one of those days that sometimes happen when you have a special needs child. Perhaps you get weary of hearing about some of the struggles. I suppose I cannot blame you if you do. It might be best if we cut down on this topic here. I just know that I cannot apologize for some of the side effects that come with such a son. As someone said once, "It is what it is." He is as much a reason for who I am as my relationship with God. We really do not live in isolation no matter how much we may be a loner. We are still very much a product of our relationships including the one I hope you have with God.

My prayer for you is that this week those relationships draw you closer to God. Even when those people in your life nudge you the wrong direction, my hope is you draw near to God. Don't let the negative events or people in your world keep you from the very best God has for you. That will make it a great week no matter what time you awaken.

Bro. Trey

We kick off 40 Days of Love here in a week. Basically it is a six week program that focus on love in many forms and fashions. We have a few commitment cards that people turned in. My hope is we get a lot more than we have now. Part of me wonders why on earth we as good religious people need an emphasis on love. We sing about love alot. We talk about love alot. We even quote bible verses about love. Yet here we are about to begin a more intense study of love. Did we miss something along the way?

My youngest stayed home from school again today. He is probably fine now but he was slow waking up this morning. That's ok with me. We had a good time again today. I also spent some of the afternoon and evening going over the gospels to review what they say about love. The results surprised me greatly. Jesus does talk about love from time to time in these records. But more than that He lives a life of love. He shows His love to people in all types of conditions. His basic message in the first three gospels is that we are to love God and love others. The disciples probably got it even better after three years of seeing that love in action. Jesus does not spend tons of time explaining love or giving lofty sermons on love. He just loves.

John's gospel underscores Jesus' understanding of love. It begins with the love of the Father. Jesus lives His life as a display of the love of God in daily life. He says very little about His love until the end of His life. It is there that He opens up to tell His followers just how much they are loved. Did you know that He never says unity is something we agree on or even vote about? He says unity is the result of love. No wonder unity is something we know so little about.

And so we begin our journey in a few days. Perhaps we cannot cram three years of the life of Jesus into a six week undertaking. But maybe we can start an adventure of love not just for days but for eternity.

Bro. Trey

Tonight? Well, tonight is a bit odd. There probably isn't a better way to describe my feelings or thoughts. Sometimes it just happens to me. Every so often life can be rocking along when it feels out of sorts. Sometimes there are events that occur that lead to those feelings of melancholy. Tonight really isn't melancholy though it is a close adjective. Perhaps it is best to say tonight just is. No doubt there are more than a few people willing to fill in the blanks.

My youngest has been home the last three days sick as I reported. He is improving and may try going to school tomorrow. You should know that my life is better when he is around. God in His wisdom opted to grant me an autistic son. Sometimes there are those questions of how life would be if he were "normal." Probably more than a few people at church or out in the community would be content if he were that way. But in the end, he is who he is. And that makes me who I am.

So we cleaned out these two rooms at the house. He played games while it was left to me to trash, file or pack away stuff from the last eight years. We did our parts well. Clothes and other stuff was found that had gone missing for awhile. He may have a whole new wardrobe now. It's not easy dealing with all the accumulation of stuff over time. You have to face it in order to know what to do with it. He did not appreciate my efforts near as much as I. He didn't know I wanted the best for him in his domain called his room. He just saw dad rummaging around while he tried to make sure Mario won his game. But he needed the cleaning and so did I.

Melancholy may be the best word for the night. It won't be the last word though. David the king knew full well about being down emotionally. He also knew that the morning offered new joy. Jesus knew his disciples would wrestle with melancholy during those last hours of His life. He knew that a better day was coming. It would be healthy for believers to know these times may come. It isn't really any one's fault. Maybe it is just the result of an overbooked life. That's ok. What concerns me is far fewer believers grasp that the joy is possible. Even should your problems be deep or complicated there is reason for hope. God is still far bigger and better than the issues.

And so tomorrow we will hope for a more "peppy" post. Tonight, we will just cling to what matters eternally and wait for the dawn of God's new day.

Bro. Trey

We should probably tie up some loose ends from the last day or so. My blog posting has been fast and furious since Monday. My youngest is home with the upper respiratory infection. He is snoozing now but he just does not feel good. He starts antibiotics tomorrow. The bad part of this is my work is juggled between watching him or talking to doctors. The good part of it is that I totally cleaned house on two rooms that were in dire need. At least there is some sense of accomplishment with this.

My thoughts keep returning to both MLK day and the Inauguration. Whatever follows now is completely my view. This post speaks for no one but myself. These ideas are the result of my experience and my education. Perhaps there is no better way to say it than to just say it. Racism still runs rampant in our world. That is no great breakthrough for you but do we really grasp what that means? Racism is not just a southern issue. It resides in every state of our union. The question is who is racist and why. It is not merely a black/white problem. In our country it involves all the ethnic groups that make up our great land. Do not let anyone tell you that it doesn't happen up north or out west or on the east coast. It does happen everywhere.

My main idea is that it is still part of the whole outcome of when Adam and Eve blew it. It takes only a few chapters of Genesis before the seed of the Jewish/Arab conflict is displayed. Today we throw out the term racism to cover almost anything. It is my belief that because of this we will lose the sense of how ugly a sin it is. Please don't even imagine that I am immune to this sin. There are no doubt dark corners of my heart where it resides. Yet I am grateful for having experienced great friendships with people with a different color than mine. My one hope is that neither of my children will deal with this ugliness in their life. Racism makes us no better than anyone else. It does put us in the need for forgiveness.

I spent much of my growing up years in the company of African-Americans. Most of my teammates on sports teams were black. I sat next to more than a few in high school that were black. Many afternoons after football practice I would drive a truckload of my teammates to their homes way back in the woods of Cass County. Here is where I witnessed the huge difference between their homes and mine. My very first sermon was delivered in the Damascus Baptist Church of Lodi, Texas. As I recalled on Monday, I also spoke one rainy Sunday in one of the historic black congregations of Shreveport. None of this qualifies me to know tons about how it is to be black. It simply lets you know some about my experience there.

It took 100 years after the Civil War for there to be Civil Rights in the United States. Barely sixty years ago a solitary man named Jackie Robinson broke the race barrier in Major League Baseball. Only thirty years ago did black athletes find a welcome in the southern colleges to play football. Yes, I now racism works two ways. But I cannot help but come back to the idea that the cross of our Lord makes us all equal in God's sight. We are all sinners in desperate need of grace. That grace is free to all who respond. Why? Because whether red or yellow or black or white, they are eternally precious in His sight.

Bro. Trey

Today is Inauguration Day 2008. Millions are celebrating the new President today. Every news network is going almost 24 hours in coverage. They are covering even the most minuscule of moments for the new first family. It has been quite the extravaganza so far. Tomorrow reality sets in though. Here are a few thoughts on the day that are mine alone. They do not speak for anyone else but me.

To be honest, I did not vote for our new president. You need to know that it wasn't about anything other than my approach to government. I am one of those radicals who believes strongly in lower taxes (f0r all) as well as less government intervention. I do believe government can do good things. I just believe the power of bureaucracy usually takes over before it reaches that point. I am neither Republican or Democrat. I am a mongrel mix of both. I am not beholden to the Christian Right or to its Left. My convictions were reached in deep thought as well as study of history. Now, I will support, pray for, and wish the best for our new leader no matter what.

Here is my one worry as a historian and a theologian. We elected a president and not a messiah. This is in no way aimed at Mr. Obama. If he is as smart as I believe that he is then he worries about overwrought expectations. He is being hailed as a great hero much like Caesar of the Roman Empire. I know this isn't from him necessarily. People tend to get wrapped up in their wishes to the point they lose sight of their hope. My worry is those on the left will become still more disenchanted than they were the past eight years. My fear is the right will try to throw obstacles to anything our president wishes to try even when they are good. Think back to the first Gulf War and the days after 9/11. Both presidents delighted in approval ratings that were unreal. Both found out that crashing back to earth is very painful. I may not agree with all of Mr. Obama's views but neither do I wish that to happen to him.

I generally like our new president. If he reads this blog and calls me over for a burger then I would be happy to go. It does not matter to me what color his skin or the fact he is a Yankee! He seems like a very confident young man who enjoys being a dad to his girls. I will not even question nor criticize any of his statements on his faith. If we are truly biblical then we will pray much for him and his family. We will ask God to grant him wisdom and humility. He may find that having the highest office in the land is not near the same as wanting it. And so may God bless the president and the people of the United States.

Bro. Trey

It's been almost 30 years since I broke down a racial barrier. This is one of those stories that I do not often for whatever reason. But I can promise you that it is true. I signed out of school one spring day in 1979 to drive a classmate over to Louisiana Tech University for a football scholarship interview. My dad was involved on the medical side of the team so we went to most home games. The school wanted to sign a running back from my high school to play for them. We left East Texas in the morning for his meeting. After he finished with the coaches then I picked him up for the ride home.

Here is where it gets interesting. My grandmother lived in a small North Louisiana town about 20 minutes from the college. So I said that I wanted to run by and see her before we returned home to Texas. Her office at that time was in the courthouse on the square. I found her and we went across the street to the drugstore that still had stools around the bar. The three of us sat down. That was when I broke the barrier. See, no black person ever sat on the stool as far as I could remember. My friend was black. I never thought two seconds about it. When I recall some of the looks around the store, I know several others thought on it much longer than those two seconds. We didn't stay long and headed home back to Texas. He did go to school there to college. I would wager that he didn't return to the drugstore.

Racism is one of those issues that will not go away with MLK Day or a President Obama. It is not a problem just limited to the South either. Racism isn't even something that only we white people deal with. It is an evil cycle as old as the book of Genesis. Believe me, I would love to tell you that I have no prejudice. But can we be honest here? Isn't there racism hidden away in most hearts in some form or fashion? We even sing about how Jesus loves children of all colors yet segregate by those same colors for worship.

My very first attempt at a sermon was delivered in a black Baptist Church. About five years later I spoke in one of the historic black congregations in Shreveport. Yes, I was way out of my league both occasions. One of my groomsmen in my wedding was black. My usual comment is that he still is the same color. Racism isn't something that loosens its grip on any person of any ethnic background without a fight. Dr. King spoke of someday reaching a mountain top where color didn't matter. We are still not there. We may be further up the hill but only God will take us the rest of the way.

Bro. Trey

Ever wonder how your minister feels at the end of a Sunday? It is about like being run over by a room full of hyper kindergarten students repeatedly. Imagine at least 20 of these precious children launching themselves at you at full speed at the same time. That is as close to a description as I can give you. This is not to say that it is a bad or negative feeling. Tonight is honestly a pretty good feeling. There are more than a few Sundays where it is quite the opposite. Thank goodness tonight is not one of those occasions.

Trust me, I feel as bad or worse on those days when the sermon is not quite up to prophetic standards. You think it is hard to listen to a bad sermon? Just think about being the one delivering such a pathetic effort. It is so not a pleasant experience. We knew going in that we were dealing with a three day weekend. People who have Monday off tend to head for the hills, valleys, beaches, mountains or anywhere but church. Such behavior used to bug the daylights out of me when I was younger. Now I can keep my mellow perspective on such Sundays.

We face real obstacles in terms of the future of the church. What I mean by that is not this one particular church. My reference is to the church in general as we know it. I see the research as well as the reality and we face legitimate difficulties. Rick Davis is on his way to be Pastor of Brock Baptist Church. He writes about the bleak present and future of the church in general over at aintsobad.typepad.com. Many of his writings say the very things that got my attention a few years ago. The church will survive without a doubt. But, be clear to know that the church as we know it probably won't.

How will the church that survives look in the future. For one, it will be biblically simple in its faith. It will be a place that values all people and relationships. For sure the church that thrives will not get hung up on types of music. They will do music well no matter the style. It will be a church where the pastor guides people to discover their gifts and then turn them loose. It will be a place where all ages blend together with no sense of superiority in any fashion. Sounds great doesn't it? Why don't we see more of it now? We are the chief obstacle to all of this. This is why we tend to deal with conflict more than we do anything else.

Ok, so how did we go from how pastors feel on Sunday night to the future of the church? Honestly, it beats me how it happened. I know that the possibility is very real for this one church to be better than ever. It isn't something that I can control however. My role is to guide, lead, encourage and more for us to be open to God's hope. I don't mind being weary on Sunday nights as long as we are moving that direction. I still believe we are doing just that.

Bro. Trey

Saturday night always finds me doing the last minute preparation for tomorrow. Sometimes I read about other pastors who finish their sermon work by Thursday or Friday. They just review their efforts on Saturday. Sigh, that is so not me. Maybe in a few years when my daughter is in college that may be possible. It just isn't going to be a reality now. Also, there are too many occasions when God gave me some really cool idea on a Saturday. This does not mean that my messages are what we call in the business "Saturday night specials." Those are sermons not even started until that night. I am way ahead of that train. It would be way too painful if it ran me over.

I usually come to the office most nights to read and think. It is usually after 10:00 when everyone else goes to bed. During the day when I am in the office I want my door open. Again, some pastors close their doors or hide out during the day to study. It is just better for me to try to leave my doors open unless there is something that just cries for my attention. At night it is still and quiet. Here I can process the day or open up books to research. This just works for me.

So for the next hour or so I will be going over all I collected this week. Some of the events of the previous week may find its way into what I say tomorrow. Some of what occurred will remain between me and God. I may even spend some time thinking about material for the blog. There is one idea working its way up about our new President. One of the days will probably say more about our 40 Days of Love experiment. Perhaps there will be a day or two to say things that will break up the routine here. In the end, this is my last time to get myself ready for Sunday. I pray you are doing the same.

Bro. Trey

Ah, bet you thought there would be no blog post for today. We may be running behind schedule but there is still time for one. The day finally slowed down some now that it is quiet in the evening. This may be a post that rambles but it is for sure one for today! If this rambles then it pretty much is par for the week. I think rambling would be a perfect description of the week. It rambled.

Let me hurry before I lose you even more. This is just one of those weeks that came apart before it even began. It's an example of why I said that I don't try to detail my schedule to every minute. My hope is that it was a good week along the way. There was a death that took the week in a new direction. We have a few who are ill or dealing with other physical ailments. We are also trying to pull together our 40 Days of Love event that is coming soon. Add to all of this the usual demands for study in preparation for the times I speak. Now do not read this as a complaint. It is far from being negative or swimming in self pity. It is just reality.

We all face days, weeks, or even longer times facing these upheavals. Life is not always what we plan. Sometimes life is what happens while we are occupied with making plans. How we deal with the weirdness of life reflects on how anchored we are in the faith. For example, one night this week I tried to go to the store. It took me longer because when I went to pull onto our street I had to wait for cows to cross! This was very peculiar. Even living in Texas it is not everyday a herd of cows meander across your residential street. All I could do was wait and soak up the moment of bovine behavior.

This is about enough rambling for one night. Now all I need to do is get my head together before Sunday. Seeing as that hasn't happened in my 47 years the odds are not good. My encouragement to you with all of this is to just let life happen sometimes. God may be doing His thing even if it isn't on your schedule. Keep your head together as well as your faith to see just how it comes together.

Bro. Trey

Would you believe that the more I blog, the more that I think of to write about? One of the reasons I didn't blog was lack of ideas. Now it seems each day brings more ideas than I can handle. The key issue for me is in making the time to write. The last few days lean heavily toward the hectic category of life. One of the really fun things these days is my daughter having her friends over after school. Just today there were at least five extra kids here at some point. They are noisy, messy and usually hungry! Yes, that indicates there were teenagers in the house. I think I am the Kool Aid dad around here.

One of the main reasons that I stay here is due to her friends. They do have a great time it seems. The dad in me is thrilled to see her making good friends. My hope is she can hold onto them over the years when high school is over. That wasn't true for me. I didn't see some of my graduating friends from the night of the ceremony until the 25th reunion. Geography, school and family just took me in a much different direction. There aren't even many from college that I stay in touch with. Part of it is surely my fault. Some of it is the nature of the job. Some of it just happened along the way.

Even now, making friends is not easy. You have to remember that I am not a human being. I am a minister. We are aliens much like Mr. Spock. There are few places or people where you can just let go and be yourself. Others don't want to run the risk of seeing the human side of the clergy. Then there are others who do tend to bring out the all too human side of the minister. Someday perhaps all of this will meet in the middle. Let me share with you a secret about ministers. We tend not to become friends with other clergy or at least not in a large number. There is a hidden and jealous side of us that can infiltrate even the best of professional relationships. Over the years I saw guys seek to use one another more than understand each other. We usually don't want you to know this but it is still true.

This post is not about self pity for the nature of friendships. It is just one of the hazards we come to realize as the years go by. Nor do I wish you to think I do not recognize or feel ungrateful for those who do try to accept my humanity. I do and I thank those who try. The real point is about how teenage girls can just be together with no demands but to share the joy. It is about the laughter that I get to hear when the house is full. It is about the off key singing in my truck when taking them to a game out of town. It is about the truth that the simplest and best gifts of life are truly free. That would be friendship...and the blog!

Bro. Trey

Death is not one of those topics that people look forward to considering. One survey said at least 35% of us are "death avoiders." That means they do not want to think, talk or even consider anything remotely related to death. We know people like that. It is a bit like discussing religion and politics where few agree. This is a sad thing to me. To be human is to know that death is as much a part of life as breathing. Statistics show that one out of one of us will die sometime. We may not like that fact but there is little we can do to change it.

No one told me when I started the ministerial journey just how much death would play a role. It was a lot of trial and error for me during the first few years to grasp that. Fortunately I spent a week in a seminar dealing with life and death issues. The lessons learned there would be sharpened over the years of ministry. I know that I may not be perfect but God allows me to do some duties in a death event that may go overlooked.

Anyway, the point of all this is that we may need to remember life has its limits while we are on planet Earth. Some funerals in the past were of those who lived a long, full life with God's blessings. Sometimes the funerals were tragic in nature. There were services with caskets much too small for people much too young. I presided over funerals with a room full of people eager to hear from God. I also presided over a few that only had a handful attend. On occasion I even assisted the funeral home workers in preparing the body to leave the hospital or the home. I am 47 years old but my life rubbed elbows with death far more than most.

One of the gifts of such a life is in learning to appreciate each day. I spoke to one of our members over the last few years who faced a terminal diagnosis. Would you believe that I envied him in some ways? He could look to what is truly important in life for direction every day. He could make up his "bucket list" of what he wished to accomplish. I told him that I knew each day could be my last even without a diagnosis. He reminded me always that life is in God's hands. We will say more about this in a later post. But for now, isn't God's hands a good place to be in life or in death?

Bro. Trey

You can never know when a day begins just how it may go. For years one of my goals was to be a person who planned each day in detail. For those same years it was a frustrating endeavor. My intent was good and honest but the outcomes often fell miserably short. I finally gave up and went to a larger view of my tasks for a week. It is not a perfect approach but it resulted in much less stress. I would wager that the major goals of a week still get done with more enthusiasm.

Today is a perfect example of how this works out in my world. My truck is at the doctor having a "waterpumpectomy." No, there is no insurance for that. My daughter took the remaining car to visit the doctor and run errands. The phone started ringing early at the office. One of my favorite people passed away this morning. Perhaps there will be more to say about this at a later date. I had emails to write, calls to make and a blog to write. In between all of this my cleanliness gene kicked in and I did some organizing. It isn't even 1:00 yet and it is a full day. Luckily there are more tasks left for me to do after this writing.

This is just how life tends to be. I still envy those who move from their duties as written on a planner. Some will still think my approach to be lacking in specifics. I decided this is my life and it will be lived with my gifts, abilities, and skills. God has a way of interrupting life with water pumps and crises. There is no reason to be bent out of shape because the day does not fit my idea of how it should go. We are all different in how we deal with life. The one common denominator is in allowing our God to have access to our schedules.

We learned from Abraham this past Sunday that there are times you simply have to go out on the proverbial limb and trust God. We may not always know why things are going the way they are. The good news is that we do not have to know all the details. Will we love and trust God when the day seems to go off target? Can we do the small yet very real tasks that seem contrary to normal behavior? These are questions not answered in the safety of a Bible study class or even a blog. We answer them in the decisions we make and the actions that we choose daily. I hope we choose wisely.

Bro. Trey

You are going to be lucky today. My gut tells me that this will be a short post in blogdom. I am still recovering from yesterday. The good news is that my truck has not blown up yet and will be taken to the doctor tomorrow. My best hope is for "outpatient" procedures for whatever is wrong. I don't need to be without it for too long with all that goes on in my world. Perhaps there is nothing to do but wait and see.

My message yesterday morning was on Abraham's crisis of faith in Genesis 22. I said in my last blog that it is far from easy material. The hard part of covering such a story is to not get wrapped up in all the cosmic elements without being realistic. Abraham is told by God to offer up his son as a sacrifice. I love my children and cannot even begin to imagine all the pressures that word from God brings. My faith might take another approach than how Abe responded. Yet I know that in each day there are decisions to be made that are similar to the one in Genesis. Will I love God when His word and will seems so odd? We probably will not know that overwhelming stress of Abraham. We will surely know the daily choices that reflect our heart toward God. Can we act in faith waiting for God to connect the dots of His larger purpose? How often is it that we decide to take matters into our own hands without an active trust in the God of promise? I cannot answer these questions for you. I hope that you will answer them as you go about daily life.

It is now time to go get ready for my kids to come home from school. Once again I move from the deeply theological to just being dad. The pay may not be great but the benefits are terrific. It does give me plenty of material for the blog!

Bro. Trey

Someday I will stop counting the days of continuous blogging. But you should know that tomorrow will be one week of non stop information. Some of the information may not be important. Some of it may be irrelevant but it is consistent! This was one long Sunday. There really is no reason for me to be sane much less awake by now. But even by my high standards of evaluation I will give the day a solid B.

I really hope the morning service went half as well as it seemed. The sermon was not exactly the type where one expects much public response. It was honestly one of those where it is difficult for me to deliver. Genesis 22 is not one of those cheerful or uplifting chapters. That being said, it is very essential for us to study such stories on occasion. We had a terrific church wide lunch of soups and sandwiches. My soup was great. Then I got to sit and visit about history, politics and baseball with one of my members. All three of those are favorite topics of mine. There was supposed to be another meeting right after lunch but no one showed. Me and my son went home and I changed for my afternoon run/walk. It was not a pretty bout of exercise this afternoon. My legs are still feeling the effects from Friday's brutal pace. I got my three miles in and returned home to prepare for yet another meeting and the evening service. Thank God the meeting went well. I survived the evening service which was my hope as weary as I felt.

A minister wears many hats. One of the real oddities of this job is in going from delivering God's holy word to returning to normal human life. What this means is I went from talking about the Bible to running errands at the store. I sometimes wonder if Moses and others went through the same strangeness of ministry. In addition, my truck needs to go to the auto doctor this week. It is leaking or losing coolant somehow. Would you believe that I bought some coolant and tried to replace what was lost? I do not have a mechanical bone in my body. No one ever taught me about cars or engines and such. Yet I bought coolant and filled in what was lacking in my vehicle. I am really hoping nothing explodes tonight.

Not many people probably think of how a minister changes from being holy to being human in a moments notice. This is the reality of the job. We go from the magnificient to the miniscule without missing a beat. We can even go from being God's man declaring God's word to blogging. As my late Grandfather in law would say, "ain't that a kick in the pants!"

Bro. Trey

It's Saturday! I'm still blogging after five days. I am even blogging on Saturday. This was a fairly decent week. I hope that I got lots done at work and at home. My oldest is out prepping for the academic UIL contest in March. Afterward, she is going to a movie with one of the smartest and best kids in our school. This girl has a great big brain! The best part is she is as nice as she is smart. My youngest and I will soon head out for our ritual of Saturday errands. This includes a truck wash, a trip to Best Buy along with a meal. A good time will be had by all. Thus it will be a good end to a pretty good week.

I almost forgot the big event of the week while juggling work and kids. Elvis turned 74 on Thursday. I hope you wished the king a happy birthday wherever he is. I am not a ginormous Elvis nut. You won't catch me with a big pile of hair on the head. I do try to stay away from the Elvis diet. But I am man enough to admit that I enjoy some of his music. I always enjoyed his early 70s songs. That is my favorite era of his music. It was during bell bottoms and jump suits but he wasn't nearly as high or obese as when he died. His voice was still clear and strong without the effects of drugs on his system. Anyway, I celebrated by slipping a CD of the king in the truck while running errands Thursday.

To me, the story of Elvis is one of tragedy. Here is a man with an amazing gift but a man who never could out sing his personal demons. It is a story of self destruction at its worst. All of his talent, his so called friends, and his money could not save him from himself. It was a pretty good life overall. The tragic part is he could do so much more than he did. It kinda makes him just like you or me. We talk alot about Jesus saving us from sin and Satan. We tend to forget He also came to save us from us! Just like the king who recorded several albums of gospel music, we need more than words. We need the words of the gospel in word or song to take hold in our heart. I know I need that.

Bro. Trey

I will admit that I read too much sometimes. Much of my day is spent reading either in books or in the never ending amount of material to be found online. You need to know however that I started reading at an early age. Even though my college minor is in history I still think about going back to school to earn an English degree. I read. I am "addicted" to reading. Not everyone is like that. Part of it is in how God wired me. I can be honest enough to state that some of it may be due to reasons not quite so noble or godly. I read lots of novels during the course of a year. I read in history/biography quite a bit. My most recent accomplishment is The American Lion by Jon Meacham. It is a very readable biography of Andrew Jackson. Now my attention is turning to another book by Bob Woodward on the Bush presidency. Maybe there will be time to sneak in some comic book reading along the way.

One of the things about our founding fathers (including Jackson) is how much they relied on the writing of letters. If you ever read a serious biography of these great men or women you will find out much of the material comes from their letters. There was no Internet or text messaging then. Their thoughts about life, government and even God reside in the letters they wrote. Andrew Jackson devoted much of his day to writing letters. They are the source of his communication on his feelings about the topics of his day. People like John Adams, Thomas Jefferson and George Washington are known to us intimately because they wrote letters.

I wish we lived in those days. Today we send texts that leave out punctuation and vowels. We have our own new grammatical need to interpret texting. We drop hastily written e-mails that are devoid of emotion or intellect. When we do write it is usually just the bare basics that reveal little about our character. I confess that I am guilty of all the above. Our world moves too fast for letter writing that is insightful and informative. One of my hopes for renewed blogging is to see this medium as letter writing to whoever stumbles on it. There is much to say about this but it will wait for another day. I close this post, "sincerely yours."

Bro. Trey

Today took a strange turn beginning with last night. My autistic son takes meds to help him both sleep and concentrate the following day at school. In a bizarre turn of events, he got two doses last night. This is not a good thing. He stayed home with me today. Thursdays tend to be tough around our house all the way around. In some regards, Thursday is my Saturday. Or perhaps it is closer to my Friday. I usually work to some extent on Saturday night. Even if my "sermon" is totally written and wrapped up I will still make time to review or edit or just fritz over it. By the time Thursday comes along it is a great day to catch my breath.

So what does a minister do with his week? That is not an easy question to answer. Every minister has their own method to coping with the madness. Some of the higher strung personalities get everything done perfectly by Friday. Sadly, that is not me. My conclusion after 20 + years of ministry is that there is no one way to do this job. Years ago I would ask men who served in much larger congregations about their approach yet none of those answers worked for me. The only person who came close to how I try to juggle my work is Ed Young Sr. He said the first part of his week was geared to the work of the church. He used the last part of his week for preparation for messages and the sort. That seems to be my routine at the moment.

Each minister has to find their own groove. In my setting here there can be all manner of interruptions or emergencies that arise. I am also the parent that is here to meet my children after school or go to the schools if needed. Let me clear about this one thing to any minister of any type in any setting. Your family and your children come before your work. You may not always be a pastor etc but you will always have a family relationship. I make NO apologies for juggling kids and work at times. I never will.

Monday is a day where my brain is usually a tad tired from the Saturday night and Sunday activity. It is a good day for projects that call for little study. This week I got tons done on two major projects coming up on Monday. Tuesday and Wednesday are transition days for study or sermon preparation. I can pull material together for Wednesday or start looking at the next Sunday. On Thursday my main goal is to have enough done for Sunday that I can put an outline in the bulletin. Fridays are days of catching up on odds and ends of the week.

This job is what they call 24/7. So is life. Some may not always "get" how a minister allots his time. There will always be those with suggestions or even criticism on how to do the job. We cannot escape that difficult part of human nature. We as ministers can only aim to keep growing in skills and in spirit. Maybe we can even blog faithfully when we find that niche!

Bro. Trey

Welcome to day three of the great blog experiment of 2009. So far, so good. I do know that my topic from yesterday still carries on here. Discipline does matter. I have to confess to failing in an area or two in 09 though. No, you can't know what areas that failing affects. Let's just leave room to say that there is time to improve. I am still exercising regularly. The weather took me inside the last two days. Even I do not feel the need to run/walk 3 miles in the rain. Luckily, I can get into the gym at school to jump rope and lift weights.

This is a good place to state publically why exercise matters to me. There is no way when I graduated from high school that I could imagine exercising this much at the age of 47. I walked out after receiving my diploma weighing a hefty 165 pounds. Two years later my weight ballooned up to 185 pounds. Needless to say is that I am a late bloomer. The summer I spent in Georgia in 1982 left me weighing well over 200 pounds. If it dies, it fries in the deep South. By my mid 20's I was hit and miss on working out. Most of it was miss than hit. In 1991 we moved to Louisiana and I joined a health club. Somewhere there is a photo of my newborn daughter and me standing on a treadmill. When we moved to Naples I started running with our local undertaker. Yes, he nearly killed me. Since 1991, exercise is part of my life. It is not just to control weight or gravity. I do it because I am aware of my family history as far as medical issues go. I know what the prospects are for high blood pressure and the sort. I also do it because of my autistic son. I want to be as healthy as possible for as long as possible for him. Another reason for exercise is financial. Since I probably will never make a six figure salary it seems logical to work for as long as possible.

Some may say that I am addicted to exercise. That is entirely possible. I am not crazy about the aches and pains that become more a part of life with aging. But I do like knowing that I can sneak an extra dessert at the church dinner. It is exercise that allows me to get out and think, pray and reflect while going round and round on the track. Sometimes the Lord gives me some good information while gasping for oxygen. My body may be a temple but I am not ready yet for it to have renovation. In the end, my newest discovery is that the discipline of exercise can lead to discipline in other parts of life. Like blogging!

Bro. Trey

This is day two of my 2009 blog experiment. I know that I missed a few days at the start of the month but taking down decorations was my first duty. It always seems a tad bittersweet to undo all the colorful stuff we put up at Christmas. This year we are moving from cardboard boxes to great big plastic tubs for the lights and all. Sure does make it easier to take a look into a bucket and know what lies within.

Anyway, one of my recent topics of reflection is personal discipline. Here is how it came about. For the last year or so it is my regular habit to go for a Sunday afternoon run/walk. There is something about that time that clears the head from the hurry of the morning grind. At this point I would almost rather skip a meal than to miss that time. Weather is no factor in this time outside. I run/walk in temps that are triple digits on occasion. Recently, the temperature is much colder yet I still get my run/walk. It is a great time to reflect as well as to let go of stuff.

The real point is my conclusion that if I can make this a discipline then I can do better in other areas of life. We all make choices for better or worse. We all have priorities that drive those decisions. Why can I not find greater focus in my responsibilities as well as running? I can choose to make time for spiritual discipline. I can choose my behavior and my attitudes in life. I can choose to fulfill both my roles as a person and the responsibility that I have. Jesus lived His life based on divine priorities. The apostle Paul writes of subjecting his body to carry out God's will. I may not ever get where I want to be but surely I can be better. Besides, blogging is much less physically draining than running!

Bro. Trey

I found the blog again. I didn't realize that it's been four months since my last writing. Perhaps time does fly when having fun or otherwise. Many things occured in these last months. School is in full swing. Kids are growing. Work keeps moving at its own pace. Lots of people continue to keep up with their blogs day by day. I confess that I envy those who can daily record their thoughts or opinions. One of my resolutions for the new year is to try to write down stuff here.

Why did I stop blogging? To be honest, one of the reasons was the occasional response I got. The anonymous negative comments just finally got to me. I doubt I would do much better in this new year. Being criticized in pointed ways hurts. My skin may be a tad thick but I am no rhino. Another reason for the stoppage is my wondering if there was anything interesting to say. There are all types of blogs on all manner of subjects. I make it a habit to read a few each day. Comparison tends to make one feel obsolete. That is one of those sins only I can overcome.

Maybe there will be more to write about now. We can talk about the things that are on the church calendar. I want to say some things about being a minister. Perhaps this is a good spot to give summaries of sermons or studies. I know that not many may be reading this. My promise is only to keep writing.

Bro. Trey